Oopsie

Hm, I haven't updated in a while. My computer is still not fixed; partly because I think it's a crying shame to pay 160$ for something I'm certain my engineer brain should be able to fix. Also because I seem to have a newly discovered inability to spend within my means, and my paychecks are gone moments after I receive them. If only I could be as thrifty in the last 3 days of my pay period when my account is overdrawn and I have no money for gas, food, or beer as I am during the first week and a half, before I realise I've overextended my funds, yet again.

I can still run my computer in safe mode, but there aren't any viruses on it (which apparently safe mode isn't intended to protect you from, in the first place). For the first couple of weeks, the wallpaper was plain black, with an annotation in each corner saying, "Running in safe mode" (hey, thanks for the reminder!). Now, there are very fine, blue streaks running vertically down my screen, which might mean that the problem really was the RAM (or that i'm about to become acquainted with the matrix), like some guy I talked to about it said, and my last bits of RAM are about to be killt. I wonder how long I can survive without any computer besides my work computer.

I'm sort of in a rut, despite having a date this Saturday. Meh, I'm really not that into him. And I sort of resent how all my friends seem to be getting concerned that I'm not dating anyone. Even my friend Kehla, who went about a year and a half without dating anyone for any length of time, brought up how summer is for flirting with cute boys. To that, I say, "I'll date when I'm good and ready... And when I meet a boy who's worthy of my affections."

My birthday was a week ago, which I enjoyed. I tried to milk it for a whole week, but only managed about 3 days before I just wanted to go back to normal: letting other people call the shots is sort of my thing. Of course, that gets me in trouble when the chain mail making guy at my party takes a shine to me. (ok, ok, i flirted with him first. it's a terrible thing to have such a low opinion of oneself. you think you're worthless, so you flirt with anyone who looks at you, and end up inadvertently hurting a lot of feelings).

Someday my self-destructive tendencies will end.